The battle for the realm of light…is not won. Thanks to Terra and Mickey, I know what’s at stake. I’m not afraid. I will face the long darkness. The next time someone wanders into the realm of darkness, I’ll be here. A light to cut through all the shadows. I will be their wayfinder. And one day, I’ll return to Terra and Ven. I am Master Aqua. And that’s a promise.
ya’ll headcanoning Miles shoplifting art supplies on the regular when canonically he can’t even get away with tagging a postal box with a removable sticker…is very sus…
Whites: so he uhhh is black…so they STEAL but he does it artistically….UwU
It shows they really want to apply racist stereotypes to miles even though it doesn’t make any sense whatsoever lol. First of all Miles is a good kid who would never steal and his family clearly has enough money to buy art supplies, even the expensive kind lol. And even if he wanted to steal something, you think Jefferson would let him get away with it?? Never have I heard someone headcanoning Spiderman as a thief. Spiderman, the friendly neighborhood hero who walks people home and stop people from robbing stuff, is gonna steal stuff from art stores????
I’m telling this story again b/c fuck it but anyways I was playing D&D and one of my friends went “brown bear brown bear what do you see” and on cue three of us turn to him and like, death metal screech “ALLLL”.
The dude goes completely pale faced. I saw true horror in his eyes.
He didn’t know the joke.
So apparently dude just had three of his best friends demonically screech at him for no goddamn reason.
I do not think I will ever cause that level of sheer terror and confusion ever again in my life.
I can’t believe Spider-Man defeated not one but TWO Disney films and grabbed the Golden Globe
Oh my goodness I’m so happy *ugly sobbing*
People don’t understand why this is a big deal.
Disney has a stranglehold on animation. Ya’ll remember when Frozen came out? Well when it won the Oscar for best-animated film, it was revealed that the people voting didn’t watch any of the other films. Frozen only won because of it’s brand name. For Spiderverse to defeat two Disney films is big because not only does it prove that animated movies feature people of color can be successful but it’s also showing that other animation companies have a chance.
I love how he gave this bit at an autism benefit because it is also a heavy Autism Mood™
This is the most relatable thing I’ve ever seen.
TRANSCRIPT:
JOHN MULANEY: I normally don’t notice people. I zone out constantly. Have you ever zoned out for a few minutes? I’ve been zoned out since 2014.
AUDEINCE LAUGHS
MULANEY: I just - all day long, I wander into traffic walking like Charlie Chaplin, listening to a podcast while thinking about a different podcast.
AUDIENCE LAUGHS
MULANEY: I can zone out anywhere - I was at the doctor’s office, he was reading me the results of a blood test, it was important I listened, and I zoned out! I was like, “nah, I’m gonna stare at the wall and think my thoughts”.
AUDIENCE MEMBER WHOOPS
MULANEY: I was like, “huh. None of the Beatles had moustaches… but then one day, all of them had moustaches.”
AUDIENCE LAUGHS
MULANEY: “That’s weird, I can’t think of a time a group has done that”. Some people in my life don’t want me to zone out as much - they want me to focus, and they want me to be in the moment, and they want me to do this by meditating. I don’t know if you’ve ever tried meditating, but I’ve been trying it. This is how you meditate, okay? You sit on the floor with your back perfectly straight, which I hate more than ISIS -
AUDIENCE LAUGHS
MULANEY: I don’t like sitting up straight! Alright?! It’s never gonna happen! If meditating was sitting hunched over on the toilet with your elbow on your knee while kind of looking at your phone, I’d be the Dalai Lama.
AUDIENCE LAUGHS/APPLAUDS
MULANEY: I don’t like sitting up straight. So you sit up straight, and you breathe, and this helps you stay in the moment. Don’t bother! The moment is mediocre at best!
AUDIENCE LAUGHS
MULANEY: I mean, it’s fine. Let’s all try right now - let’s all be in the moment, in silence, right now. [A HALF-SECOND PAUSE] Sucked, right? Not fun at all!
AUDIENCE LAUGHS
MULANEY: That was boring! You gotta zone out! You have an imagination! You have a movie theatre in your brain that plays fake arguments that you win.
AUDIENCE LAUGHS/APPLAUDS
MULANEY: Have you ever just been sitting there thinking about something for twenty, twenty-five minutes, and all of a sudden you’re like “oh my god, I’m driving!” and you remember? You’re like -
AUDIENCE LAUGHS
MULANEY: “I’m going seventy-five miles an hour! I have been for a while! I could’ve changed so many lives!” Sometimes, my wife - I have this wife - she’ll be like, “are you watching the road?” and I’m always like, “I am looking through the windshield.”
AUDIENCE LAUGHS
MULANEY: “And I’m not gonna hit anyone, but no. I’m thinking about the Beatles.”
Hey @vulpeculavolans added a transcript to this AND THAT IS SO AWESOME THANK YOU SO MUCH!
“I’m gonna stare at the wall and think my thoughts.” Is my true ADHD/Autism experience lmaoooo
